Sunday, January 30, 2011

The First Month - TMI

This is my "Too Much Information" Post...

And it is because of thinking back to my 10 Things They Should Really Warn You About Before Getting Pregnant post. There is the list of symptoms that you have during pregnancy, but what about the after part? Sure, there is some nasty stuff that goes on during pregnancy, but as a cousin of ours and I were talking one day, it is the after birth/labor part that is gross. I had said that if those things were discussed then people probably wouldn't get pregnant. Well here I go, I am going to talk about it...

The Mommy Nastiness:

1 - Still healing... 

That means the stitches from the tear. The painful soreness that comes from pushing a 36.5 cm head out. There is going to be stretching yes, and high chances of a tear or even an episiotomy (luckily I did not have one of those!). It is not comfortable and even hurts to sit down! Luckily by this point I do not hurt all the time, but still every now and then it comes and I cannot stand.  When people tell you to just sit at home for the first few weeks, listen to them and do it! Of course, you probably wont want to get up and walk around anyway! (and take some of the ice packs they give you, those work and the coolness feels great!) I have not looked at the stitches. I prefer to just not... 

But, this also effects your ability to use the bathroom. Well, right away at least. That is one reason they monitor your urine at the hospital (for the first 3 that is). Well, that and if you have an IV they will want to monitor. That and your ability to have a bowel movement. Lets face it... It hurts, and if you can do it, more power to you! Don't be surprised if it takes a while for that ability to return! When they say to eat fiber, do it. They will suggest a stool softener or laxative to help out as well, if fiber doesn't work (and there is a high chance it wont). And from the pushing: a hemorrhoid will result. Not like you can narrow down where and how to push. There is one general area, bearing down and pushing as hard as you can is going to effect that general area. A hemorrhoid means no easy bowel movements.

2 - The Stomach...

The stretched out, floppy skinned, softened abdomen. The muscles have separated and don't be surprised if you can feel the looseness of your stomach. You lie on your side and it pools to the bed you are on. Gross... You stand and it hangs there. I miss my yoga mat, yoga moves, and pilates. If your muscles are not back together yet, don't work them out unless you want them to stay separated. Mine are just barely getting less than a finger space apart. And that is a weird feeling, the finger space. 

If you have stretch marks, I am sorry but in the same boat. Those areas will most likely be stretched out more so than the rest and will take longer to tighten. I have tried lotions galore and still no result. I am half tempted to get the facial firming lotions and see the effect those will have on my stretched out, red stripe of motherhood marked stomach. At least they are not so bad. I call them my "Red Stripes of Motherhood" like the red badge of courage or stripes that the military earn. Only these are for motherhood, the noblest of all professions. It's work, just not recognized as a profession. (ok a tangent and sorry)...

3 - The Blood...

I do not suggest to look at the placenta. A bloody sack really. Who needs to see that when you will have a good few weeks (or more) of the blood seeping (ok more like leaking) out? It is worse that menstruation! People suggest to bring with you to the hospital: pads. The thick kind that holds a lot, and with wings. At the hospital, they give you these huge ones with underwear like shorts to hold them up. Well, if you want to ruin your underwear, use your own pads. You will be changing them often (I mean like the overnight, super absorbent ones). But they are not as long as the ones from the hospital and still do not hold as much. There is no wonder we do not get our periods for a while after labor (like months!), and that is because of the shedding that takes place immediately after, it is just far worse.

4 - The Breasts...

It hurts. The engorgement that comes. The first few weeks of baby latching on. Ouch! The painful result on the nipples. Nursing cream helps tremendously. There is a gigantic possibility that they will bleed. Yes, that all goes away as you and baby get more used to breastfeeding. It does get easier. But the engorgement from the milk coming in. The pain from that is never something that I think you can get used to. Thus causing them to leak. This is gross, and sticky. My friend's sister-in-law suggested to place an extra shirt in the diaper bag (also great in case of spit-up incidents), and it is a great suggestion. I suggest it as well!

When the baby starts that "I'm Hungry!" cry, you will feel it!

5 - The Body...

Yeah, exhaustion! And stinky sweaty grossness with really little opportunity to shower. Sure, you can put the baby in a bouncer or a swing in the bathroom (they will fall asleep), but that is if you can put them down. Of course that is if you actually notice the time before you need/want to go to bed. And even if you shower (because of hormones) you will start to sweat anyway. Good luck with still feeling decent by the end of the day.

The Baby Nastiness...

1 - Meconium...

The black, tar-like substance that is excreted from the baby's bowels. Difficult to clean, and a little stinky. Need I say more? 

The moment this stuff is over with and the baby's poop has changed, you will rejoice!

2 - Spit-Up...

Ok, so not as gross, but still... It will take a while for baby to not do this anymore. I have read that once baby starts eating more solids, then he/she will start to do this less often.  A reason for the extra shirt in the diaper bag: not fun when it has soaked through a rag and all over the front (or back) of you. It is amazing that the baby is not hungry after seeming like he has expelled all the milk you just fed him.

3 - The Diaper...

Not so bad once the poop has gone from black to yellow/green (thusly named Grey Poupon).  It is mostly when there is a blowout. Yes, diapers are not miraculous wonders, and stuff does not always stay inside. When they say you can't have too many onsies, that is the truth!  And not to mention getting peed on!


But, it all is totally worth it in the end. They are so precious, and brings new understanding to the term unconditional love.