Fast forward a few years. Our MOPs group brought back the Book Club for Kids we started my year as the events and creative activities person. The host picks a book, does a craft, and maybe a snack to go with it.
The recent pick was the "rainbow fish".
My son is studying rainbow fish in second grade. I realized in some conversation with him that I hadn't read the full story, or there was something I was missing.
I decided to go and experience the book in a new light. So many people enjoy this book. I felt I must have been missing something.
And... I missed parts talking to some other moms.
And... I missed parts talking to some other moms.
I decided to find a reading on youtube. We sat and listened to the whole story. I was let down by the story again.
The artistry is alluring. I understand the want to teach our kids to share. It's the premise behind the type of sharing that drives me nuts about the book. There was more to it and I couldn't put my finger to what I didn't like.
So I set to trusty Google to see what else others might have said. I can't be alone in my opinion in this over-opinionated cyber world. I found at least 4 (here, here, here, and here) posts. The rest, several pages were art activities for kids. Yet. I am not alone in my opinion of the book. Thank goodness, at least.
1st issue. overly prideful. I have this same issue with Thomas the Train. Yet, kids are like this. We weren't born void of sin, so that's understandable. The colorful fish would flaunt his scales to the other fish even though they wanted to play with him. Now there is nothing wrong with taking pride in god given gifts, abilities, and traits. Yet, flaunting them is not ok. The rainbow fish wanted to know why the other fish turned their backs? Maybe if he made more of an effort to play. It wasn't the fact that he had the scales and didn't share that was the problem, but the fact that he was flaunting them to the other fish.
2nd issue, the demanding little blue fish. Like so many of the other posts, this one bugs me. The rainbow fish had every right to say no to giving away his scale to the little blue fish. It was not asked of him to give a scale away but demanded. We don't demand things in this house. We ask nicely. At least that is what I tell myself and remind my children when they demand. After the octopus said his thing and the little blue fish came back further irritated me. Starting to not be mad because he only wanted one scale. Again, a demand. Not asking nicely.
3rd issue, the other fish only played with him after he gave his scales away. Like another of the posters stated, what if there were more fish and he didn't have enough scales to give to them all? He is essentially buying his friends using the scales? Are those fish true friends? Taken literally, should we harm ourselves for the sake of having someone as a friend?
My husband found it nuts that he wasn't happy until all the fish were the same, with one shiny scale per fish. He claims socialism undertones.
What I wish was that there was more to the growing happier when giving his scales away. More towards the rainbow fish's change in behavior and attitude and less about the fish taking away the scales and playing with him because they have a scale. Don't get me wrong. Generosity and giving is a good thing to promote, it's the premise behind it that bugs me the most.
Now, I'm not going to shun this book from my house.
The best thing about this book? All the room for this book gives for meaningful discussion with the kids. Life isn't perfect. Stories aren't going to present and solve problems perfectly. This book gives so much for us to use with our kids from the behavior of the rainbow fish to the little fish.
I hope my kids will be better than to flaunt something in front of their friends. I hope they don't demand things from their friends or expect their friends to give them something just because they have so much. I hope they know that it is ok to say no to giving a piece of themselves away, that those people aren't going to be very good friends if they demand or expect that.
All those points you can use throughout the book and talk about. We were lucky. My son brought up the book and a writing assignment he had from their study. What kinds of things can you share with your friends? He didn't know. It also happened to be my daughter's 5th birthday and she picked the meal. My son threw a fit because he didn't want to eat it. She picked chicken wings, tater tots, salad, and rolls and he didn't want to eat the bone-in chicken wings. It was the perfect opportunity to talk about the kinds of things that we can share vs. things we might not want to share and don't have to share. Our now 5-year-old chose to share some of her favorite food with her family because it is something she enjoys. My son decided to eat the food despite the bones in the chicken. He enjoyed dinner, and ate more than what my husband and I anticipated. And, he said he had an idea for his writing assignment.
I still don't like the book. It's not a favorite. But we may not have had the discussion at dinner about sharing. I hope that we can read that book and use those disliked elements for developing further meaningful conversations with my kids.
1st issue. overly prideful. I have this same issue with Thomas the Train. Yet, kids are like this. We weren't born void of sin, so that's understandable. The colorful fish would flaunt his scales to the other fish even though they wanted to play with him. Now there is nothing wrong with taking pride in god given gifts, abilities, and traits. Yet, flaunting them is not ok. The rainbow fish wanted to know why the other fish turned their backs? Maybe if he made more of an effort to play. It wasn't the fact that he had the scales and didn't share that was the problem, but the fact that he was flaunting them to the other fish.
2nd issue, the demanding little blue fish. Like so many of the other posts, this one bugs me. The rainbow fish had every right to say no to giving away his scale to the little blue fish. It was not asked of him to give a scale away but demanded. We don't demand things in this house. We ask nicely. At least that is what I tell myself and remind my children when they demand. After the octopus said his thing and the little blue fish came back further irritated me. Starting to not be mad because he only wanted one scale. Again, a demand. Not asking nicely.
3rd issue, the other fish only played with him after he gave his scales away. Like another of the posters stated, what if there were more fish and he didn't have enough scales to give to them all? He is essentially buying his friends using the scales? Are those fish true friends? Taken literally, should we harm ourselves for the sake of having someone as a friend?
My husband found it nuts that he wasn't happy until all the fish were the same, with one shiny scale per fish. He claims socialism undertones.
What I wish was that there was more to the growing happier when giving his scales away. More towards the rainbow fish's change in behavior and attitude and less about the fish taking away the scales and playing with him because they have a scale. Don't get me wrong. Generosity and giving is a good thing to promote, it's the premise behind it that bugs me the most.
Now, I'm not going to shun this book from my house.
The best thing about this book? All the room for this book gives for meaningful discussion with the kids. Life isn't perfect. Stories aren't going to present and solve problems perfectly. This book gives so much for us to use with our kids from the behavior of the rainbow fish to the little fish.
I hope my kids will be better than to flaunt something in front of their friends. I hope they don't demand things from their friends or expect their friends to give them something just because they have so much. I hope they know that it is ok to say no to giving a piece of themselves away, that those people aren't going to be very good friends if they demand or expect that.
All those points you can use throughout the book and talk about. We were lucky. My son brought up the book and a writing assignment he had from their study. What kinds of things can you share with your friends? He didn't know. It also happened to be my daughter's 5th birthday and she picked the meal. My son threw a fit because he didn't want to eat it. She picked chicken wings, tater tots, salad, and rolls and he didn't want to eat the bone-in chicken wings. It was the perfect opportunity to talk about the kinds of things that we can share vs. things we might not want to share and don't have to share. Our now 5-year-old chose to share some of her favorite food with her family because it is something she enjoys. My son decided to eat the food despite the bones in the chicken. He enjoyed dinner, and ate more than what my husband and I anticipated. And, he said he had an idea for his writing assignment.
I still don't like the book. It's not a favorite. But we may not have had the discussion at dinner about sharing. I hope that we can read that book and use those disliked elements for developing further meaningful conversations with my kids.
